Why Do People Bully?

Insecurity

A fairly popularly known reason why people of all ages bully is because they are insecure. They constantly worry about what other people think of them, and they do not want to appear weak or insufficient to their peers. In their minds, taking charge of any and all situations and mocking others will in still fear and insecurity in their victims. If they are able to make other individuals feel insecure, then they can forget about their own personal voids and take pleasure in the fact that someone else is weaker than they are.

Selfishness

Many people are selfish whether it be about money, making social plans, or sharing toys. At the most basic level, imagine a child in a preschool class playing with his or her favourite toy. Another child approaches and wants to play with the item. Instead of sharing, the first child may shout "No!" or "Get away!" or "I don't like you!" These are all forms of bullying because the child is not sharing, and is being hostile towards the other individual.

Adults are certainly not beyond this level of immaturity. Take two teenage girls, for instance. One of them is bossy and overbearing, and the other is shy and meek. The latter can easily be bullied into doing whatever the "friend" wants because the former knows that her shy friend will never stand up for herself. Even if the bossy one does not call her names or make fun of her, she is still mentally manipulating and bullying the individual.

Sense of Superiority

On the opposite end of those with insecurities are the bullies who taunt others because they feel entitled to do so. This group can certainly include anyone who is overconfident; however, some familiar examples may help to further develop the argument. Everyone is familiar with the high school cheerleader and football star who rule the school and mock anyone who is not "cool" enough to be their friend. Of course, this is a stereotypical image in and of itself that derives largely from media portrayals, but it helps to put the problem in context.

Another image, also particularly prominent in movies and other media, that people are familiar with is the boss of a major company who pushes his employees around, treats them as slaves, and takes away their holiday pay. A fitting example is the boss in the famous National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.

The Ease of Bullying

Bullying today is so much easier than in the past because individuals have so many more outlets in which to express themselves. In the past, people could often seek refuge from bullies at home, at a coffee shop, or in their favourite hiding place. However, nowadays, cruel text messages, emails, and phone calls taunt bullied individuals all day long. People can even block their numbers so that the victims do not know who is tormenting them. Social networks such as Facebook and MySpace allow bullying to become public and constant as well.

By: Nursazella

Types of Bullying

1. Physical bullying includes any physical contact that would hurt or injure a person like hitting, kicking, punching, etc. Taking something that belongs to someone else and destroying it would also be considered a type of physical bullying. For example, if someone was walking down the street and someone came up to them and shoved them to the ground, that would be physical bullying. In elementary and middle schools, 30.5% of all bullying is physical.
2. Verbal bullying is name-calling, making offensive remarks, or joking about a person's religion, gender, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, or the way they look. For example, if there was a group of kids who made fun of another kid because he couldn't run as fast as everyone else, it would be an example of verbal bullying. 46.5% of all bullying in schools is the verbal type. Verbal aggression is when a bully teases someone. It can also include a bully making verbal threats of violence or aggression against someone's personal property.
3. Indirect bullying includes spreading rumors or stories about someone, telling others about something that was told to you in private, and excluding others from groups. An example would be if you started a rumor that a boy in your class likes playing with dolls, and if the reason that you made up the story was because you thought it was funny. This would be indirect bullying. Indirect bullying accounts for 18.5% of all bullying.
4. Social alienation is when a bully excludes someone from a group on purpose. It also includes a bully spreading rumors, and also making fun of someone by pointing out their differences.
5. Intimidation is when a bully threatens someone else and frightens that person enough to make him or her do what the bully wants.
6. Cyber-bullying is done by sending messages, pictures, or information using electronic media, computers (email & instant messages), or cell phones (text messaging & voicemail). For instance, if you sent a picture of a snake in an email to a person because you know that they are afraid of snakes, that would be an example of cyberbullying. According to a survey done in 2003 only 4% of bullying is listed as "other types" and this would include cyber-bullying. Even though this number seems small, the growth of this type of bullying is going up fast because of the spread of technology around the world.

By: Nursazella

VICTIM CONFESSION BULLY

VICTIM CONFESSION BULLY (MALE STUDENT)

Bullying secondary students one including requested become “laundress senior student uniform” religion in schools hostel full including in woman students is one normal matter, that former student confession that ever become victim bully. "We would kicked about and will be threatened if do not want teacher know offences committed," said Al-Mashoor Lelaki Pulau Pinang Religious National Secondary Schools's former student, Khairol Ikram Salamat (picture). According To Khairol one of victim and the friends will be threatened by senior students to close secret on offence that they doing. "Our time the new form one, so when has done offence albeit small, senior students will threaten to report to the discipline teacher and effect would fare even worse if it reach to parents knowledge. "So us given choice of whether want to encounter with discipline. symptom bully in school do not just involving normal daily school on the other hand also happens against school religion however might be considered remote because the number that small. "Actually in religious school also happen case bully, the situation same only in any school. It like a practice especially to older student for bullying junior student especially in orientation week.

VICTIM CONFESSION BULLY (FEMALE STUDENT)

"Almost my four months so I senior sisters, I need to wash clothes they every day."Not one, on the other hand three people in a time... we such as distributed to small groups, new student every one will get three people 'foster sister' and we need serve to them," he said. However clear him activity on managed to halted when one of from the partner sound off to the family. "All our fear want complaining to anyone because threatened by senior and will receive action more if matter oleaking.

By: Suraya

Stop Bullying!

1. Make sure that all know the anti-bullying policy. Even better, make sure that as many pupils, parents, governors and staff as possible are involved in its creation. Ensure that preventative approaches are co-ordinated with approaches in the behaviour policy; better still, the ‘whole-school positive relationships policy’. Above all revisit it regularly, remind yourself of its wisdom and write notes on it that will inform thinking when it is revised.

2. Keep written records of observations, meetings and actions taken. Make sure that records are kept in keeping with advice from your local authority. It is always helpful to develop a bullying report pro forma on which reported incidents are recorded and a pro forma for meetings with parents.

3. Become familiar with a variety of processes, strategies, skills and the philosophy that underpins them. Behind an approach is a rationale that informs what it is trying to achieve. Failure to understand an approach can lead to negative comment, condemnatory attitude and a dilution of its potential for change.

4. Explore alternative to punishment. Punishment will not work for many of those who are punished regularly and can be counter-productive for the occasional minor misdemeanour. Exclusion from school because of bullying is a last resort and it is preferable, but not necessarily easy, to develop strategies involving adults and children that create a climate in which to bully would be anathema and in which it is dealt with effectively.

5. Get away from the bully-victim model. Powerful forces for change are bystanders and we are all bystanders. All members of the school community have a role to play in confronting negative relationships, helping bullies to change their behaviour and supporting victims.

6. Preventing bullying is about the school and classroom culture. It is important that staff examine the school and themselves and consider the extent that bullying may be institutionalized rather than celebrating individuality, difference and the unusual, as a bullying culture thrives on ridiculing these features. We must not only tolerate difference but celebrate it and help children to make wise choices if they are to be active and responsible citizens.

By: Nursazella

Solution

What schools can do:

• Get an accurate assessment of the problem. An anonymous survey is a very effective way to learn about the true nature of a problem at a particular school.
• Maintain higher visibility. Most schools report that most of their bullying problems disappear when playgrounds, bathrooms, etc., are properly monitored. Supervising recess is especially important.
• Have students develop class rules about bullying that are then consistently reinforced. It is important to start this in very early grades to gain a handle on this problem before it gets out of control.
• Conduct in-service training for both teachers and parents. Stress that bullying is not just boys being boys or high spirited behaviour but potentially damaging for both victims and bullies. Bullying is not something that people grow out of, but one of the first signs of more serious problems. It is also important to remember that verbal harassment can be just as scary and intimidating as physical attacks.
• Have serious talks with bullies, and make them realize that you are aware of their behavior and are not going to tolerate it. It is also important to develop ways to help them learn more positive social skills.

What parents can do:

• Create a safe environment for your children to tell you about being bullied. Many times kids are embarrassed to tell their parents what happened, thinking that their parents will blame them. Sometimes kids at school pick on other kids or say mean things to them. Does this ever happen to you at school?
• Reinforce the idea that if they are being bullied, it is not their fault. Don't make your child feel like a wimp. The person that is picking on you is the one with a problem, not you. Bullies pick on people for no real reason, but it is just because they have problems of their own, not because of anything you have done.
• Don’t teach your kids to hit or fight back; it will only make things worse.

Sources : Laura DeHaan

By: Nursazella

7 Steps To Reduce Bullying At Campus

Bullying is a problem that will not be eliminated unless each staff member decides to do their part. One of the most effective ways to reduce bullying is to monitor the campus. Without adult presence, bullies will continue to torment their victims. However, if the campus is monitored, bullies will find it more difficult to harass other students. Follow the 7 steps below to help reduce bullying at your campus.

1. Discuss monitoring at a staff meeting - The first step to increasing campus vigilance is to have a staff meeting. All staff members should be in attendance. During this meeting, steps 2-7 should be discussed. The administrator in charge should make it clear that all staff members must do their part if bullying incidents are going to be reduced.
2. Monitor the halls between classes - This should be a no brainer, but many teachers decide to stay in their classrooms in between classes. This time is a prime opportunity for bullies to thrive and victims to suffer. However, if all teachers are monitoring the hallways, it will be difficult for bullies to harass their targets.
3. Identify the campus bully zones - Every campus has areas that are easily accessible to students but rarely monitored by adults. How can one identify these areas? Ask the students. Most students would gladly share this information. Another way is to walk around the campus. If there are areas that look like they might be a breeding ground for bullying to take place, these areas must be documented and brought to the attention of the staff.
4. Monitor the bully zones - The bully zones must be monitored. This means staff members must do a little extra work. Staff members should be given a schedule of their monitoring duties. This schedule should include all staff members and their responsibilities should be equally distributed. This is a key component to assuring staff morale stays high and bullying incidents stay low.
5. Monitor during recess - Some teachers use recess to catch up on grading papers or to visit with their co-workers. During recess, teachers should be interacting with the students. By properly monitoring recess time, the number of bullying incidents can be significantly reduced.
6. Require adequate supervision during lunch - Cafeteria monitors must be mobile. In the cafeteria, it is easy for bullies to verbally abuse their victims. However, with adults actively monitoring all of the students, it will be more difficult for verbal abuse to take place.
7. Monitor PE classes and locker rooms - PE teachers and coaches must take an active role in making sure these areas are monitored. Many coaches feel that teammates won't bully each other. Nothing can be further from the truth. Bullying in athletics is a prevalent problem that will not be eliminated if left unattended. Proper monitoring of campuses is one of the best ways to reduce bullying incidents. Bullies will be reluctant to abuse their victims in the presence of adults.

By: Nursazella

Consequences Effect Of Bullying

A VICTIMS

1. Short term effects - Being a victim is very stressful for children. Many children develop a strong dislike of going to school, especially times like recess or gym class. Many victims begin to distrust all their peers at school and have problems making friends. Extreme victims can develop depression or physical illness.
2. Long term effects - The long term consequences of being a victim vary a good deal. Most victims of bullying do well in school and are able to make friends are they grow older. Most victims, especially if they receive support from adults important in their lives, survive the experience of being bullied without long term effects.

A BULLY

1. Short term effects - Even though bullies are sometimes viewed positively by their peers, they rarely are capable of maintaining close friendships. They are usually not doing well in school and not well liked by their teachers.
2. Long term effects - Bullying is a behaviour that is very often one of the first steps to more serious problems. Unless some kind of intervention takes place, the aggression of bullying often leads to more serious acts of delinquency and criminal activity. Bullies are also more likely to use drugs and alcohol as adolescents.

By: Nursazella

Effects Of Bullying

If you've ever heard an adult - or anyone else - say that bullying is "just a fact of life" or "no big deal," you're not alone! Too often, people just don't take bullying seriously - or until the sad and sometimes scary stories are revealed.

• It happens a lot more than some people think. Studies show that between 15-25% of U.S. students are bullied with some frequency, while 15-20% report they bully others with some frequency (Melton et al, 1988; Nansel et al, 2001).
• It can mess up a kid's future. Young people who bully are more likely than those who don't bully to skip school and drop out of school. They are also more likely to smoke, drink alcohol and get into fights (Nansel et al, 2003; Olweus, 1993).
• It scares some people so much that they skip school. As many as 160,000 students may stay home on any given day because they're afraid of being bullied (Pollack, 1998).
• It can lead to huge problems later in life. Children who bully are more likely to get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out of school. And 60% of boys who were bullies in middle school had at least one criminal conviction by the age of 24 (Olweus, 1993).

By: Nursazella

Psychological Profiles of Bullies and Victims

Until I began to search literature on bullying, I used to think that an average class, at the most, has one or two bullies. I was wrong. In fact, a class of the size of thirty children, on average, have four to five bullies. Psychological studies on middle school children show that fifteen percent of middle scholars act as bullies one time or the other. Who falls in that fifteen percent category? What do we know about them? How can we control bullying at school and help bullies themselves shun bullying? To answer such questions, experts are asking what aspects of their personal background shapes bullying behavior. Experts are attempting to answer why some children want to dominate or intimidate their peers as opposed to winning and influencing their peers with qualities, such as charisma, humor, assistance, and cooperation.

A study conducted by The Center for Adolescent Studies at Indiana University, on five hundred and fifty-eight 6th to 8th- graders, offers some interesting insights. The study compared bullying children and non-bullying children regarding their home environment and personal behaviors. Here are the salient findings about bullies:

1. They watch more violent TV at home.
2. They misbehave at home more frequently.
3. They spend less time with adults at home.
4. At home, when they are disciplined, they face more forceful parental discipline.
5. Bullies have fewer positive adult role models. Perhaps, they don't get adequate opportunity for watching a lot of adults in their environments trying to win friends and influence people through communication, persuasion, or negotiation. Consequently, they don't get adequate opportunity to role model for ideal social skills.
6. Likewise, bullies have fewer positive peer influences. Perhaps, the peers with whom bullies identify are also trying to dominate others by fear and coercion.
7. Bullies also get into more fights.

The researchers in this study also identified children who were "high-scale bullies;" based on behaviors such as, hitting, hurting, and humiliating other children. Following observations resulted from the analysis of the family and social environment of high-scale bullies:

1. Thirty-six percent of them came from single-parent homes.
2. Another thirty-two percent had step-parents.
3. They had easier access to guns.
4. They had more exposure to gang activities.

Looking at the above information in another way, less than one-third of the high-scale bullies lived with both their natural parents. More than one third did not have both parents living under the same roof with the child. Beside the lack of two-parent rearing, many children are exposed to abuse. Kathryn Jens, a school psychologist from Denver, says that fifty percent of bullies come from an abusive environment. They simply hand out to others what they personally receive.

All bullies are not alike. While some are defiant, impulsive, and hungry for domination and power, some just want to connect with others. Unfortunately, not knowing any better, they do it in an unhealthy way. Often, high scale bullies have "lieutenants." Lieutenants don't bully others until the main bully is present; they seek approval of a parent-figure, however distorted that may be from our point of view.

Let's take a look at the victims of bullying. What is their profile like? According to Garrity, another school psychologist, some are passive and loners. They cry easily. They lack self-defense skills. They aren't able to dodge a conflict with humor and don't think very quickly on their feet. About ten to fifteen percent of victims can be described as, "provocative victims." These children are restless and easily aroused emotionally. They are teasers. They fight back against bullies and come back for more. Less skilled in fighting than bullies, they mostly lose those fights.

The majority of children don't get caught in the game of a bully. They fend off bullies with humor. They are quick to offer compromises when a bully tries to bully them, thus creating the impression on the bully that they want to be nice guys and get along. They move around with friends unlike the typical victim of bullying who is passive and stays alone.

The profile of a bully indicates that if parents don't spend adequate time with their children, they may compensate for that attention by "extortion." They may seek it aggressively and gratify themselves with power and domination over children weaker than themselves. Beside spending more time with their children, parents may also review what messages are they giving them with regard to anger control and fighting. The profile of a victim indicates that children who are very isolated need to be specially monitored for the possibility of bullying. They should be taught skills to socialize with others.

By the time a child graduates from elementary school, he or she will have watched more than hundred thousand acts of violence, and about eight thousand murders on the screen. A bully will have watched even more acts of aggression on the screen and perhaps at home, than an average child.

By: Nursazella

The Bullies

People who bully others don't often realise how much they're affecting another person's life.

They don't usually know that the people they bully can seriously suffer from stress or even become seriously depressed. People can bully others for lots of reasons. Some do it because they're feeling a type of power over people who are too scared to do anything about it. Some of the tell tale signs of a person who bullies others include:

• They deal with their own fears and troubles by showing off and acting tough
• They sometimes have problems in their school or family life and take it out on others
• They pick fights first so no-one can pick a fight with them

They might be doing this for a number of reasons:

• They don't know it's wrong
• There are copying a brother, sister or a family member they admire
• They don't know any other way to mix with school friends
• Their friends encourage them to bully

Just because someone has problems of their own, doesn't mean that the bullying of others is excusable. But it might explain why they're doing it and should be seen as a sign to talk to someone about it. Considering that head teachers can now permanently exclude someone from school for bullying, people who bully should try to find help and talk about their situation as soon as possible.

By: Nursazella

How to solve the problem?

For student, the best way to solve a bullying problem is to tell a trusted adult. For teens, though, the tell-an-adult approach depends on the bullying situation. One situation in which it is vital to report bullying is if it threatens to lead to physical danger and harm. Numerous high-school students have died when stalking, threats, and attacks went unreported and the silence gave the bully license to become more and more violent.

Sometimes the victim of repeated bullying cannot control the need for revenge and the situation becomes dangerous for everyone. Adults in positions of authority — parents, teachers, or coaches — can often find ways to resolve dangerous bullying problems without the bully ever learning how they found out about it.

If you're in a bullying situation that you think may escalate into physical violence, try to avoid being alone (and if you have a friend in this situation, spend as much time together as you can). Try to remain part of a group by walking home at the same time as other people or by sticking close to friends or classmates during the times that the bullying takes place.

• Ignore the bully and walk away. It's definitely not a coward's response — sometimes it can be harder than losing your temper. Bullies thrive on the reaction they get, and if you walk away or ignore hurtful emails or instant messages, you're telling the bully that you just don't care. Sooner or later the bully will probably get bored with trying to bother you. Walk tall and hold your head high. Using this type of body language sends a message that you're not vulnerable.

• Hold the anger. Who doesn't want to get really upset with a bully? But that's exactly the response he or she is trying to get. Bullies want to know they have control over your emotions. If you're in a situation where you have to deal with a bully and you can't walk away with poise, use humor — it can throw the bully off guard. Work out your anger in another way, such as through exercise or writing it down (make sure you tear up any letters or notes you write in anger).

• Don't get physical. However you choose to deal with a bully, don't use physical force (like kicking, hitting, or pushing). Not only are you showing your anger, you can never be sure what the bully will do in response. You are more likely to be hurt and get in to trouble if you use violence against a bully. You can stand up for yourself in other ways, such as gaining control of the situation by walking away or by being assertive in your actions. Some adults believe that bullying is a part of growing up (even that it is character building) and that hitting back is the only way to tackle the problem. But that's not the case. Aggressive responses tend to lead to more violence and more bullying for the victims.

• Practice confidence. Practice ways to respond to the bully verbally or through your behavior. Practice feeling good about yourself (even if you have to fake it at first).

• Take charge of your life. You can't control other people's actions, but you can stay true to yourself. Think about ways to feel your best — and your strongest — so that other kids may give up the teasing. Exercise is one way to feel strong and powerful. (It's a great mood lifter, too!) Learn a martial art or take a class like yoga. Another way to gain confidence is to hone your skills in something like chess, art, music, computers, or writing. Joining a class, club, or gym is a great way to make new friends and feel great about yourself. The confidence you gain will help you ignore the mean kids.

• Talk about it. It may help to talk to a guidance counselor, teacher, or friend — anyone who can give you the support you need. Talking can be a good outlet for the fears and frustrations that can build when you're being bullied.

• Find your (true) friends. If you've been bullied with rumors or gossip, all of the above tips (especially ignoring and not reacting) can apply. But take it one step further to help ease feelings of hurt and isolation. Find one or two true friends and confide how the gossip has hurt your feelings. Set the record straight by telling your friends quietly and confidently what's true and not true about you. Hearing a friend say, "I know the rumor's not true. I didn't pay attention to it," can help you realize that most of the time people see gossip for what it is — petty, rude, and immature (D'Arcy Lyness, PhD)

By: Hartini

What the effect of the bullying?

Sadly, some students are so traumatized by being bullied that they become very depressed. Miserable and unable to communicate their dilemma to anyone, they feel their situation is hopeless and sometimes commit suicide.

The film Rats & Bullies tells the story of Dawn-Marie, a 14-year old girl who took her own life after being relentlessly bullied by three teenage girls who were her classmates. View a trailer of the movie. Dawn-Marie left a suicide note in which she named the three girls. Later, they were held accountable for the bullying.

Bullying is always has a negative impact. It can be long term or short term and the impact can be physical, mental or emotional, your awareness of the impact of bullying will help you to understand it, address the behaviors and support the person being bullied.

Bullying can have serious effects on children who are bullied. These children are more likely than their peers to be depressed, lonely, and anxious, have low self-esteem, feel unwell have more migraine headaches; and think about suicide (see Limber, 2002, for summary).

Signs that a someone is being bullied

• Changes in behaviour such as becoming withdrawn or ill-tempered

• Scratches and bruises that are hard to explain

• Changes to social life - not seeing friends or staying away from clubs

Besides that, bullies can give effect include immediate feelings of anger, hurt and fear leading to longer term problems such as eating disorders, depression and low self-esteem. Because so many student with learning disabilities are bullied, it is common for them to feel ‘anticipation’ a sense of fear and anxiety about being bullied. Some children and young people feel apprehensive about new people and situations because they are of being bullied. This can make them feel helpless and erodes their confidence. 40% of children with learning disabilities say they stay away from the places where they have been bullied. Bullying is not inevitable and there should not be "no-go areas" for children with learning disabilities.This makes it even more important for young people to feel that adults will respond to bullying when it happens.

It can be devastating to learn that a young person who you are close to is being bullied. However, well-intentioned over-protective behaviour can often make things worse. Some young people lose their freedom, or are not allowed to take risks. Adults need to take steps to deal with the bullying, not keep young people away from situations where bullying could happen. This is especially true for children with learning disabilities, who often have less access to a social life than their peers.

How Does Bullying Make People Feel?

One of the most painful aspects of bullying is that it is relentless. Most people can take one episode of teasing or name calling or being shunned at the mall. However, when it goes on and on, bullying can put a person in a state of constant fear.

Guys and girls who are bullied may find their schoolwork and health suffering. Amber began having stomach pains and diarrhea and was diagnosed with a digestive condition called irritable bowel syndrome as a result of the stress that came from being bullied throughout ninth grade. Mafooz spent his afternoons hungry and unable to concentrate in class because he was too afraid to go to the school cafeteria at lunchtime. Studies show that people who are abused by their peers are at risk for mental health problems, such as low self-esteem, stress, depression, or anxiety. They may also think about suicide more.

Bullies are at risk for problems, too. Bullying is violence, and it often leads to more violent behavior as the bully grows up. It's estimated that 1 out of 4 elementary-school bullies will have a criminal record by the time they are 30. Some teen bullies end up being rejected by their peers and lose friendships as they grow older. Bullies may also fail in school and not have the career or relationship success that other people enjoy.

By: Hartini

The solution to Bullying in Schools

Bullying is an inherent part of school life. It will only be solved when people are prepared to make a radical re-appraisal of the way in which children are cared for and educated.

Schools Bully Everyone

Children are being bullied to a greater or lesser extent from the moment that they arrive at school. This is not because all teachers deliberately set out to be vindictive and uncaring but because the system within which they work forces them to be so.

In a normal family setting, children enjoy a great deal of personal freedom and get a lot of personal attention. They learn to develop acceptable patterns of behaviour, but only slowly and in their own time. There is always an element of compromise - members of the family have to adjust their own behaviour to meet the needs of the new member just as much as the young child has to learn to conform to the requirements of the family.

This give and take does not happen once the child goes to school. The system is rigid and inflexible, children must conform or else they will be punished. Sometimes they are punished when other children fail to conform, the system is unjust, but the children have no right to appeal against injustice, they do not receive personal attention: there are not enough adults present to make it possible.

This is institutional bullying and it sets the tone for everything that takes place in school. The children in a class soon realise that anyone who does not conform to the expected code of behaviour will cause problems for everyone - so they all gang up on the misfit. This could be the child who is a little slower than the others to understand the teachers instructions, the child who is less fit than the others, the child who is slightly deaf or who does not have very good eyesight. It can then be any child who is slightly different, a child with a different colour skin, with a different accent, different cloths, a different diet etc.

The point is that every child was a separate individual when they first went to school. The bullies who victimise the children who don't fit in seem very offensive to us - but they also are the victims. No one fitted in on the first day at school, some children just proved more amenable or more capable of being moulded into a certain pattern than others.

The biggest bully in the class is always the teacher. It is the teacher who comes down ruthlessly on any child who tries to express their own individuality - even if its only talking or walking around the room - the lesser bullies are only following the big bully's lead.

Pretending that one teacher can put twenty or thirty children through a pre-determined course of education, day in and day out, without bullying them is to deny the obvious and demonstrates a lack of resolve to solve the problem.

Pathetic Excuses

School in its present form is a fairly recent innovation and the reasons why it is the way that it is are pretty well documented: state run primary schools were created to keep children off the streets while their parents were at work and compulsory secondary schooling was invented because there were no jobs for teenagers.

The whole system is more about cheap child care than about real education; it has only been going for a couple of generations and it was entirely predictable that it could not be made to last any longer - children who are not cared for properly themselves make terrible parents and their children make even worse parents and their children are completely unmanageable.

Instead of acknowledging that school is an inhumane way of treating children, people try to blame the children themselves. When children are not being blamed, it is their families, and when it is not their families then blame is directed at individual teachers for not being strong enough to control bullying.

Taking Responsibility

Everyone is waiting for someone else to solve the problem of bullying, in particular people expect the government to come up with a solution.

Surely the natural instinct of a parent who discovers that their child is being attacked is to protect that child - not to expect the government to do something about it.

The natural response to seeing your children being bullied at school - whether by the teachers or by other children - is to stop sending them to that school.

People are reluctant to follow their feelings on this because they are frightened of the consequences (a sign that it is the whole family and not just the children who are being bullied in this situation) but they see only the things that they stand to lose and not the things that they stand to gain.

Parents who have kept their children at home instead of sending them into a school in which they are being bullied report that their relationship with their children improves dramatically; that their children's relationships with each other improves dramatically; that their children become more polite and helpful around the house; that their children show more interest in reading; that their children start to ask questions again; that their children take more responsibility and that the whole tenor of family life improves out of all recognition.

If a lot of parents took this step then even more dramatic changes would result. Schools could not continue treating children the way they do if parents removed children who were not happy.

In such circumstances, schools that could not care properly for children would close down, and the schools that remained would have to focus on serving the needs of children instead of children being made to serve the needs of the school.

Sources: freedom-in-education

*By: Syaziela

WHAT ARE THE EFFECTS?

Bullying can cause severe emotional damage for years, and the children who are bullied aren't the only ones who suffer. The bullies also undergo serious emotional trauma, which in turn causes them to bully other children.

Emotional Trauma

According to the National Center for Children Exposed to Violence, children who are bullied may suffer from low self-esteem, as well as other serious emotional issues such as chronic anxiety and depression. (See Reference 1)

Academic Achievement

Bullying may keep kids from succeeding in school. Their anxiety, or other emotional issues caused by bullying, may make it impossible for them to concentrate on their studies or to succeed at extracurricular activities.

Hostile Environment

Bullying creates a hostile school environment, which may affect even children who are not directly bullied, who may fear being bullied and become distracted from their studies and other pursuits.

Effects on Bullies

Bullies are likely to become violent, drop out of school, or get into other serious trouble as adults. (See Reference 1) They need help as much as the children being bullied---and often, they are the victims of bullies as well, such as an abusive parent.

Bullying as Adults

Adults who bullied others as children may continue bullying their peers as adults. This can be a problem in the workplace for many people, particularly because adults' concerns about being bullied are not always taken seriously. (See Reference 2)

References

Stop Bullying Now!: Effects of Bullying

Department of Labor and Industries: "Workplace Bullying: What Everyone Needs to Know"

National Center for Children Exposed to Violence: School Violence

*By: Syaziela

Defining bullying: a new look at an old concept.

http://www.kenrigby.net

*By: Syaziela

WHEN BULLIES GET BULLIED BY OTHERS: UNDERSTANDING BULLY-VICTIMS

i. Bully-victims: A special type?

• Kids who harass and intimidate others were once lumped together. But today, researchers have identified two different types of bully.

• The “pure” bullies are the confident aggressors. They dish out intimidation and harassment. In general, they don’t get victimized by other bullies.

• The “bully-victims,” by contrast, are both bullies and the victims of bullying.

ii. Such victimized aggressors suffer from a distinctive set of problems. Compared to pure bullies, they may be more

• Anxious

• Depressed

• Lonely

• High-strung

iii. Bully-victims are at a greater risk for emotional problems

• An international survey of 11- to 15-year olds found that bully-victims experienced worse emotional adjustment in all 25 countries surveyed (Nansel et al 2004).

• Other studies confirm this trend.

 A longitudinal study tracking Finnish boys from age 8 to early adulthood found that bully-victims were at an especially heightened risk for developing emotional disorders, including anxiety, depression, psychosis, substance abuse, and anti-social personality disorder (Sourander et al 2007b).

 A study of American adolescents found that bully-victims suffered more psychological distress—-as measured by their own self-reports and the judgments of their teachers (Juvoven et al 2003). Compared to pure bullies, bully-victims suffered higher levels of anxiety and depression.

 Another study of American teenage boys found that bully-victims suffered the worst psychological health of any group—including pure bullies and passive victims (Stein et al 2007).

iv. Bully-victims may have more difficulty “fitting in”

• A Swiss study has reported that kindergartners identified as bully-victims by their peers were less cooperative and less sociable (Perren and Alsaker 2006).

• Other studies of older children have reported that bully-victims are more likely to be avoided by their peers (Nansel et al 2004; Juvoven et al 2003). They are also more likely to feel lonely and to have difficulty making friends (Nansel et al 2001; Juvoven et al 2003).

v. Bully-victims may be more likely to suffer from over-arousal

• Arousal is the degree to which we are engaged or “turned on” to the environment. It describes our state of excitement about what is going on.

• When people are in low states of arousal, they may find it easy to control their emotions.

• When they are in very high states of arousal, they may be tense and overreact to potentially stressful situations. High arousal is also correlated with an elevated sensitivity to being overlooked or going unrewarded.

• A British study measured the arousal levels of 13- and 14-year old students (Woods and White 2005). Kids who were pure bullies had rather low levels of arousal.

• By contrast, bully-victims had higher levels of arousal than all other groups, including passive victims.

• In everyday terms, these kids were high “strung.” In fact, over 23% of bully-victims had arousal levels in the clinically high range (Woods and White 2005).

vi. Bully-victims have more difficulty in school.

• An American study of young school kids (aged 8 to 13) has reported that bullies who were also victims were more likely to feel unsafe and feel they didn’t belong at school (Glew et al 2005).

• These findings are confirmed by the perceptions of teachers. In an American study of young adolescents, teachers reported that bully-victims had more conduct problems and were less engaged in school than was any other group—including both pure bullies and passive victims (Juvoven et al 2003).

• There is also evidence that bully/victims are less successful academically. In the study conducted by Gwen Glew and colleagues, bully-victims were more likely to be low achievers (Glew et al 2005). Similar findings have been reported by Schwartz (2000).

vii. Bully-victims are more likely to endorse “Machiavellian” attitudes.

• Several lines of evidence suggest that bully-victims are more likely than pure bullies to report cynical attitudes. For example, the Glew found that bully-victims were much more likely to endorse cheating than were other kids (Glew et al 2005).

• And a study of Greek primary school children found that, compared with pure bullies and passive victims, bully-victims were more likely to endorse Machiavellian beliefs and show a lack of faith in human nature (Andreou 2004).

• Perhaps these studies reflect real differences in attitude between bully-victims and pure bullies. But we have to remember that these differences are based on what kids voluntarily report to researchers. So it’s possible that bully-victims are simply more candid (or less crafty) when discussing themselves.

*By: Nursazella

WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A VICTIM?

"When I was a young boy, the bully called me names, stole my bicycle, forced me off the playground. He made fun of me in front of other children, forced me to turn over my lunch money each day, threatened to give me a black eye if I told adult authority figures. At different times I was subject to a wide range of degradation and abuse -- de-pantsing, spit in my face, forced to eat the playground dirt....To this day, their handprints, like a slap on the face, remain stark and defined on my soul." - Eric E. Rofes; Making our Schools Safe for Sissies

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Unfortunately in recent years, our attitudes have changed about what it means to be a victim. Many parents and school officials are likely to blame victims of bullying for being weak and not being able to stand up for themselves. This, coupled with the fact that victims are usually warned by bullies not to tell anyone, makes it difficult for them to talk with parents and teachers.

Ten percent of children could be considered extreme victims who have been the victim of bullies at least once a week for a long period of time. These children are often considered younger, weaker, or sicker by their peers. Victims are just as likely to be boys as girls. They often report strong fears or dislike of going to school. These children often report closer feelings to parents and siblings, but whether this causes them to be victims or is simply how they cope with being bullied is unclear. Being labeled a victim is likely to follow children around from year to year. Most extreme victims report having few or no friends and being alone at recess and lunch.

Symptoms that a child might be a victim of bullying:

• acts moody, sullen, or withdraws from family interaction

• becomes depressed

• loses interest in school work, or grades drop

• loses appetite or has difficulty getting to sleep

• waits to use the bathroom at home

• arrives home with torn clothes, unexplained bruises

• asks for extra money for school lunch or supplies, extra allowance

• refuses to go to school (15 percent of all school absenteeism is directly related to fears of being bullied at school)

• wants to carry a protection item, such as a knife

Who are the Victims?

Why do some people become victims and others do not? The victim is often singled out because of his/her psychological traits more than his/her physical traits. They are likely to be shy, sensitive, anxious, insecure, have low self-esteem and lack social skills. Physical traits that tend to be picked on are being overweight, physically small, having a disability, or belonging to another races.

*By Nursazella

Types of Bullying

A wide range of behaviours have been reported as bullying, including theft. Defining an act as bullying depends on it being intentional, persistent, involving an imbalance of power and because of the negative effect on the victim.

Name calling

Name calling was the most prevalent form of bullying identified in many studies, but an OfStEd report on effective action against bullying in secondary schools reminds us that verbal bullying can often carry a strong hint of violence. The use of modern technology means that this kind of verbal bullying can extend beyond the school day and invade life at home.

Physical bullying

There was a slight increase in physical bullying with age in boys in the Coram study (2003). Sometimes homophobic bullying was said to involve quite serious physical bullying. Older girls reported sexualised bullying with unwanted touching more than did boys.

In an extensive study of over 7000 children, Smith (2000) reported that there is a shift from age eight to sixteen from physical bullying to relational bulling, but that boys experience more physical bullying than girls. Theft can be included in this category as it often involved threats or actual violence.

Social isolation

Behaviour leading to social isolation was reported to be common throughout the age groups, but especially for younger children. This included spreading gossip and ignoring and can be especially difficult to identify.

Homophobic bullying

This is directed towards young people who are openly gay, bisexual, are perceived as gay, or show characteristics often associated with the opposite gender. When heterosexual young people are subject to homophobic bullying they can be less reluctant to report it, as this may reinforce the stereotypical way that they are already viewed by others. The bullying is often verbal, but can also be physical, and in serious cases constitutes assault, leading to investigation by the police. Harassment of a homophobic nature tends to be carried out by groups of people, and occurs often, even daily. Sexual name calling begins in the primary school, although homophobic bullying overall is more common in secondary aged students.

Cyber bullying

This is the latest form of abuse, and as new technologies develop, new forms emerge, such as text and e-mail messaging, and most recently malicious postings on websites. In the Coram study in 2003 cyber bullying was reported by fewer than 5% of pupils but anecdotal evidence suggests the incidence is increasing.

In a survey by National Children's Homes and Tesco mobile in 2005, 20% of young people

aged 11 to 19 years said they had been bullied or received a threat by e-mail, internet chat room or text message.

Racist bullying

This is one area where schools are required to keep statistics about incidents. It is bullying directed at individuals of a certain race, culture or group. For children from ethnic minorities, bullying is more prevalent with 25% of the 2003 Coram study reporting being severely bullied, and 33% of the black and Asian students in Year 8 being bullied this term, more than that reported by white groups (26%). 20% of Year 5 pupils had been called racist names compared with 6% in Year 8 so the nature of the bullying probably changes with age.

Sources: http://education.staffordshire.gov.uk

*By: Syaziela

WHAT & WHY?

What is bullying?

Bullying is when someone keeps doing or saying things to have power over another person.

Some of the ways they bully other people are by: calling them names, saying or writing nasty things about them, leaving them out of activities, not talking to them, threatening them, making them feel uncomfortable or scared, taking or damaging their things, hitting or kicking them, or making them do things they don't want to do. Have any of these things happened to you? Have you done any of these things to someone else? Really, bullying is wrong behaviour which makes the person being bullied feel afraid or uncomfortable.

Why do some people bully?

There are a lot of reasons why some people bully. They may see it as a way of being popular, or making themselves look tough and in charge. Some bullies do it to get attention or things, or to make other people afraid of them. Others might be jealous of the person they are bullying. They may be being bullied themselves. Some bullies may not even understand how wrong their behaviour is and how it makes the person being bullied feel.

Why are some young people bullied?

Some young people are bullied for no particular reason, but sometimes it's because they are different in some way - perhaps it's the colour of their skin, the way they talk, their size or their name. Sometimes young people are bullied because they look like they won't stand up for themselves.

Why is bullying harmful?

Some people think bullying is just part of growing up and a way for young people to learn to stick up for themselves. But bullying can make young people feel lonely, unhappy and frightened. It makes them feel unsafe and think there must be something wrong with them. They lose confidence and may not want to go to school any more. It may make them sick.

Sources: www.nobully.org

*By: Syaziela

WHO IS THE BULLY & THE VICTIMS?

Bullying always happen to students from upper secondary level of four, five and six that have large gave body, robust, and high they are involving a group of students and have a same age. Bullying is one way to lose feeling bored in school. The success of bullying students, will show their strength, power, and not easily to fear with anything.

Otherwise, victims of bullying are students who are often be a victims, its was a students who are in lower secondary level one, two, three, and primary school student. Beside that student who have a small gave and always often praised by teachers will be targeted by bully and also new student at school.

during the case bully happens. The article show that 16 years old boy student was dead because bullying.its sacrifice the lives of the cases have occurred in the royal military college that caused the death of a student Mohamad Naim Mustaqim 16 years old after loss of consciousness after the sentence imposed by the push-ups and he was kicked by his friend in a room at the school early morning on 24 June 2010.

Mohamad Naim Mustaqim was the eldest son who comes from a hard family but have an excellent academic results and he going in the royal military college at February 2010, but at 10:45 pm 23 June 2010, victims who do push-ups and then kicked in the stomach caused by his victims who tried to stand up and go unstable and then fell and his head hitting the floor before unconsciousness.

Are woman involved in act of bullying?

Many consider the act of bullying are only involved by boys, however it is wrong because female studentsa also involved in this incident. Despite the relatively small percentage, but these things can lead to serious acts if not confined. Bulying among girl usually involves physical teasing. For example if the female student was fat and have a dark skin they will use as a target for ridicule. However the act of bullying is not so violent as boys.

*By: Hartini